Marriage is blessing if happens at right time but it becomes curse if not done at suitable age or with in correct match. Timely marriage plays a vital role in terms of physical & mental health of individuals. These days, the challenges of finding the right partner, adapting to single life, and becoming comfortable in a committed relationship are the main causes of delayed marriages.
“Les mariages se font au ciel”, is a well-known French proverb that translates to “marriages are made in heaven”. Further explanations include the existence of a spiritual bond in addition to love between couples and the fact that time is a key factor in developing this chemistry.
Factors of delayed marriages:
Some of the causes of late marriages are personal, while others are social in nature. Lack of prompt decision-making, losing the available options, and searching for the best option that satisfies all the demands are some of the major factors that contribute to delayed marriages. To make sure that you are not embarking on a course that you will later regret, however, must consider all factors.
1. Physical cause:
Academic ambitions and desired features like fairness, height, small family, living standards, looking face value not the spirituality, behavior and level of understanding, preferring personal likes, etc. are the main reasons of delayed marriage due to physical cause. Many parents impose conditions that until their daughter completes the professional degree, become doctor or completes her house job they will not think on marriage. The major reason why a lot of individuals decide to marry late is to help them finish from the higher institutions and attain their career objectives. Although they are interested in marriage, they want to establish their financial stability first before doing so.
2. Being overly choosy:
Many women suffer from delayed marriage because during their early stage of marriageable life, they have many suitors lining up for them. They keep turning every one of them down waiting for the Mr. Right. They forget that the beauty of a woman fades over time. Thus, they end up not marrying till the later part of their lives. Then the time comes when they have to advertise for zaroorat e rishta. Most times, these women are just eager to do everything possible at later stage to get a match. They may even opt to sponsor their marriage ceremony and wedding and fell into wrong hands.
Most men have delayed marriage due to exorbitant dowry prizes; families wish list is too long to achieve. Many men who cannot afford to pay the dowry prize plus other expenses defer marriage. They wait for such a time they would be buoyant enough to shoulder the responsibilities. This explains why people delayed marriages in the first place.
4. Social & family bindings and pressure:
Other group of men just put off marrying till later date because they want to show that they belong. Sometimes the excitement and pressure from family and friends make them to desire showy wedding. When the fund is not yet available, the last alternative is to keep postponing marriage to the detriment of their marital life.
These days things are gone really very hard and commercialize. The economy is biting as hard as possible. The responsibilities that come with marriage are enormous A man would put off marriage until later unless he is well-off financially and confident enough.
Even People contacting the institutions of Matrimonial in Pakistan insist that the girl must belongs to the upper class or job oriented. So that she too can work abroad and improve the family’s financial situation along with her husband.
5. Dreams for settling abroad:
One of the reasons is to settle abroad due to adverse living standards and facilities available in under developed countries so moving abroad and settlement take 3 to 5 years of time span which causes delay in marriage. The goal of parents or families is to relocate abroad before making the marriage public. Therefore, this is another significant reason why people delayed marriages.
6. Financial independence:
Nowadays, both men and women favor postponing marriage because they want to achieve financial independence. If they went to college or worked toward master’s or doctoral degrees, their marriage will be late.
Many young adults think that cohabitation serves as a “test drive” before marriage, which is why they advocate it. Several more people think that cohabitation prior to marriage lowers the divorce rate. The main reason why people delayed marriages is thus also due to this.
The positive & negative effects of delayed marriages:
Everywhere in the world over the past few decades, the age of marriage has risen for both men and women. There are benefits and drawbacks of delayed marriages. Both male and female would have to deal with the effects of a late marriage. Despite the fact that some people prefer to marry later in life and that some people cannot wedded at a suitable age.
Social scientists claim that late marriage has many advantages. However, it may also contribute to a number of issues with family stability and coupling patterns. The majority of them concur that delayed marriages indicate that both the husband and wife are more mature, more likely to make good spouses, and more likely to achieve their personal goals in life without having any regrets.
Advantages of delayed marriages:
- Marriage comes with more responsibilities, which prevents some people from concentrating on their personal development. It’s possible that before marriage people didn’t have enough time to fully develop their personalities. Because so many people now value their careers as well as their personalities. Personality development is becoming more crucial than ever in the modern era.
Women who marry young and have children in particular find it difficult to concentrate on developing their personalities due to their other obligations. Consequently, postponing marriage is significantly influenced by personal growth.
- Early marriages may be more susceptible to dissolution because the partners are more likely to have unrealistic expectations. The young couples may lack self-awareness and lack confidence in their own and their partners’ potential traits.
People who delay getting married have also plenty of time to find the right spouse. As people get older, their thinking and behavior become more mature due to age. As a result, as they get older, people think more deeply about what they want from a lifetime relationship.
- People who marry later may be able to pursue their educational and professional goals. Some people put off marriage in order to pursue their careers, while others put it off because they want to finish their education.
Disadvantages of delayed marriages:
- Since it is generally accepted that the establishment of the marital relationship is a prerequisite for fertility. So, late marriage has a negative impact on the fundamental purpose of family institutions. Delayed childbearing, which slows population growth, is one of the biggest consequences of late marriage.
- Late marriage may also contribute to the anomalies of children. Even though the women are capable of giving birth, occasionally these births result in kids with mental health issues. However, sperm loses its vitality, which can cause a variety of birth defects in children. Women put off marriage until later in life, which also puts off the possibility of having children.
- Those who postpone marriage might begin dating before they wed. Due to this, never-married individuals have a much higher risk of contracting diseases and infections, such as HIV, than individuals who are already married.
- Because late marriage may cause a generational divide between the parents and children, it is not good for the family or society as a whole. Since the worldviews of the older and younger generations were shaped by how their respective communities functioned when they were young, this gap results in a lack of communication and cooperation between the two generations.
After going over all the benefits and drawbacks, a brief explanation of the primary reasons for delayed marriages has also discussed. To sum up, marriage continues to be an important institution that strengthens the basis of the family, which is the foundation of society.
Late marriage has its own benefits; it gives more time to judge your better half, provides more financial security, reduces divorce rate and gives freedom. However, late marriage means lateness in enjoying the benefits of marriage. This can cause depression, loneliness, tendency of infertility and reduction of population and stigmatization.
There is need provide teaching on the advantages of good interpersonal relationship to both boy and girl, to improve on the teaching on marriage and make it more frequent, educate the youths about importance of singleness and how to handle it.
Likewise, the singles need to see their singleness as a gift from God. Both married and single are gifts from God. One is not morally better than the other, and both are valuable to accomplishing God’s purpose. Sometimes, it is better to marry late than to rush into marriage without adequate preparation.
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